On top of my Italian grandmother's dining room table sits a laminating machine. One might think it strange or out of place for a laminating machine to be a regular fixture in the dining area. But for me it would be stranger NOT to see it there. You see grandma uses it every day for something very important. She uses it to laminate obituaries.
It is an act of love and service and even sometimes a random act of kindness for a stranger.
Every day Grandma reads the obituaries (and has for many years). Sometimes she sees a familiar name or face. Sometimes she notices a distant relative or a friend of a friend. Other times a common birth place is all she shares with the person in print. Once in a while she is touched by the story of a complete stranger. So what does she do? Grandma precisely cuts out the obituary. Laminates it. Writes a note of condolence to the family member, places the obituary in an envelope with a bereavement poem entitled, "To Those I Love" and mails it. I have no idea how many laminated obituaries she has sent out over the years. Hundreds and hundreds of them for sure.
So many people have been touched by Grandma's simple act of service. A few years ago, a brother of a girl I knew in junior high passed away suddenly. Now, I'm in my forties, so junior high was a looong time ago. But still grandma remembered my friend's last name. She did some detective work, found the right Clegg, and mailed the man's obituary, along with a poem and note, to his mother. I ran into my old friend months later and guess what. The first thing she said was "thank your grandmother for sending my mom that poem." How sweet was that!
We all have our own ways of giving and serving. This is my grandmother's way. And she does it faithfully. She doesn't receive awards for what she does. She just quietly sits with her newspaper and her laminating machine and finds a way to offer relief to someone who is grieving. Can you imagine receiving a note with a laminated obituary of your loved one and a beautiful poem from a stranger? It is not so strange if you knew my grandmother. She's not very tall—only 4'11"—and says she "doesn't look down on anyone." Jokes are her way of breaking the ice so she can chat with people. She talks to anyone and everyone when she is out and about. Whether it be the grocery store clerk, the department store cashier, or the man at the post office, she is quick to share a funny joke. (Some have a PG-13 rating.) She simply finds simple ways to lighten another's heavy load. That is my grandmother.
Two weeks ago my grandfather Bill's sister died in a tragic fire accident while serving a mission with her husband in Texas. We are grateful to all the people who have reached out to my grandparents. It's true. What you give will come back to you full circle. I believe, because my grandmother has lovingly helped those grieving she has received extra love and support.
Thank you Grandma Baker! Your acts of service have not gone unnoticed. Your granddaughter sees what you have done and is grateful for your beautiful example. I love you!
Here is the poem my Grandma Baker shares when someone has passed away.
If I should ever leave you whom I love
To go along the silent Way, grieve not,
Nor speak of me with tears, but laugh and talk
Of me as if I were beside you there,
(I'd come...I'd come, could I but find a way!
But would not tears and grief be barriers?)
And when you hear a song, or see a bird I loved,
Please do not let the thought of me be sad...
For I am loving you just as I always have...
You were so good to me!
There are so many things I wanted still to do...
So many things to say to you...
Remember that I did not fear...
It was just leaving you that was so hard to face...
We cannot see Beyond... But this I know:
I loved you so...
'Twas heaven here with you!
By Islo Paschal Richardson
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